Monday, May 17, 2010

Surprisingly...

Today Nate booked his plane ticket home.
And when he called this morning to tell me, I surprisingly became emotional.
(Okay, surprising for me. The rest of you already expected it, I'm sure.)
Surprising in the way that I didn't expect to burst into tears and jump into his arms outside of Fuddrucker's when we met him there after a long drive to Florida in March.
And surprising in the way I didn't expect to start bawling (Like, everyone could hear me because I was sobbing so loud but I could. not. help. it.) in the Tampa Airport terminal when I saw him a few weeks back.
Surprising because, I'm cool. I'm good. I'm truckin'. I'm doing this thing. It's not easy, but we're doing it, you know?

Except the prospect of having someone here to HELP again... someone I can put my cold feet on at night when I climb into bed... someone who can take the 13 year old out of the room and deal with the snippy comments and angry eyes so I don't have to... someone who will load the dishwasher and sift through papers on the counter... someone who will take the kids to the park so I can sit in silence for a bit... someone who will share the carpool duties... someone who takes me on Monday night dates just because... someone to check the kids into childcare at church while I go get seats... someone to smile at me when I'm up on the choir risers... someone to prune the hedges and bag the branches so I don't scratch my arms up... someone who will kill the spiders for me...

...THAT prospect may be what brings those emotions to the surface.

Because I have one of the most amazing husbands in the world.
He protects me.
He cherishes me.
He encourages me.
He's fine with being my excuse when I need one.
He's happy to be my jacket when I forgot one.
He's okay with his shirt being my tissue when I get teary and there isn't any at hand. (Usually.)

So, I'll probably burst into tears again and jump into his arms when he flies into the Springs airport in two and a half weeks.
Maybe this time I won't be *as* surprised by my emotions.

Or maybe I'll be just fine, because he'll finally be home.





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